Having just married, on our first date,
all of a sudden, why do I hesitate?
Share the pain, I endured so long?
Or bury the past, trying to move on?
I guess I’ll just find my smile again
This could be my way out of pain.
But nothing can be forever hidden
My gosh! he looks love-smitten
It’s high time, I need to tell him
before all these lights go dim
Where do I start and where to end?
Is this the time to finally mend?
Will he try to share my scars?
And wipe a years’ worth of tears?
These chills my traumas carry
shouldn’t last even after I marry.
Toxic remnants from those brutes
Apparently, stuff that never elutes
Shuddering as it all starts coming back
Once left to die, on that forsaken track
My will to live, sinking with every breath
dissociated from my body, awaiting death
Paralysed in a shock, the wait was tough
crippled from having suffered long enough
Agonizing hours of brutal ravaging
twice, thrice, until I was haemorrhaging
Helpless cries that reached no one
didn’t stop until they were all done
I know now that a miracle happened
with broken ribs and spirits dampened.
But, here’s the man that loves me,
an excited soul that’s too happy.
With tears welled up, I’m just lost,
fighting alone, can I ever get past?
Deep into my scars, while he stares,
does it mean he ignores or he cares?
Amidst all this flooding my head,
He pulled me closer and said,
“Baby, it’s time we move ahead”
as he gently kissed my forehead.
I cried, this time with a huge relief
Now ready to turn over a new leaf.
~Revised rework of this Medium post.
